Category Archives: Family

Community Life, Family, Personal Reflection

Urgent Prayer Request (A Cry for Justice)

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[Written Sunday, March 6, 2016]: Last night around 10:30pm my husband and I put on tall rubber boots and covered up in long pants and sleeves to protect us from the hungry mosquitos as we walked down the gravel road to the big front gate of the 17-acre property where we live and work.

We waited under the large lampposts for quite some time, swatting away hungry mosquitos, before finally turning around and returning home. Our night watchman, who is armed with nothing more than a flashlight, stood guard on his front porch about 100 yards away, having already done his rounds on the perimeter of the property and probably wondering why Darwin and I were doing such a strange night-walk.

The next morning (which is today), as we all got up and everyone started getting ready for the day, our older girls – who very well knew why we had taken that walk down to our large front gate – asked expectantly if the police had come as they had promised. We’ll be there is 10-15 minutes, the officer had told Darwin over the phone the night before. Well-acquainted with disappointments in these last several days, I didn’t even sugar-coat it and simply said, “No. Pa finally called the officer and he told us there was an auto accident on the highway that they had to attend to, so maybe they’ll come today.”

Sandra (15) and Jackeline (12) scoffed and mumbled, “They’ll never come.”

Last evening while our two eldest daughters – Dayana and Sandra (both 15 years old) – were at church with a local family whom they attend with several times per month, Sandra’s sexually abusive step-father (whom she was rescued from) found them and began harassing and threatening Sandra. He passed by the home of the family where they were spending a few minutes before attending the service, and began to verbally berate Sandra and Dayana, listing too accurately all of their movements over the last few weeks – the days and times they’ve left our home to attend music class or to work on a school assignment with their classmates, etc, evening listing the clothes they were wearing every time he’s seen them – telling them that he has ‘spies’ (his friends) in our little rural town (where he, too, lives) that are tracking their every move, and that he thinks that Sandra needs to come back home to him so that he can ‘care for her.’ The mother of the church-going family pulled Sandra inside the house (they were on the porch), and Sandra – obviously very shaken up – said she wanted to go home (to our house) immediately and not stay for the church service out of fear that he would go to the church and harm her.

She took a mototaxi (which is like a three-wheeled cross between a car and a motorcycle) up the long path to our home while Dayana decided to stay and attend the church service, seeing as the step-father is not directly looking to harm her, but Sandra.

Well, Dayana stayed, and later that evening (last night) she told us that as she was standing up to read one of the Bible verses in the church service, the step-dad showed up at the back door aggressively looking for Sandra, and passed by several times after that. Once Dayana had begun her journey home in mototaxi after the service had ended, she saw the step-dad on the way (or rather he saw her), him trying to glance inside the open-air mototaxi to see if Sandra was with Dayana.

So Sandra got home first, and we listened to her and prayed, and then once Dayana got home a couple hours later we sort of repeated the whole process again, inviting 12-year-olds Josselyn and Jackeline (all four of the girls share a room in our home and, thus, a special sense of sisterhood) to join us as we all sat on our bedroom floor – Darwin and I and our four eldest daughters, as we talked openly about many different topics for what I think were several hours. Josselyn sat cuddled up in my lap, Dayana rested her head comfortably on a pile of clean laundry that Darwin and I had not yet put away, and we all sat more or less sprawled-out or propped-up in a circle sharing, counseling, listening and encouraging.

After having prayed, addressed the emotional needs and fears of our girls, and talked once more about the strongholds of abuse that Satan holds in the lives of so many (and how Father God wants to liberate them, see them walk in victory in His love), we then did an honest brainstorm of what-to-do, seeing as normal answers such as ‘let’s-call-the-police’ aren’t hardly worth mentioning.

Already in these past four or five days we have had close to a dozen nothing-comes-of-it encounters with the police about a (different) child molester who our students have seen roaming the long, lonely road up to our property and whom is known to have already sexually abused several children from our community. We’ve called the Honduran 9-1-1 to report the man several times, we’ve called the private cell-phones of several police officers who work in our area, and Darwin even made a face-to-face visit with the police officers at the local police station a couple days ago, and our efforts to protect our students from this man have produced a lot of mind-boggling frustration for us and not much else. And all we are asking is that the police – who have their official command post literally 1.2 miles from our home/mission! – do a once-a-day (or once-a-week, once-a-year!) patrol – in their car, on foot, however – just so that there is a police presence and, hopefully, the child molester gets spooked. The day that Darwin went to file the official complaint at the police station (after we had called with detailed information to no avail many, many times), the police officer who received the complaint just stared at Darwin blankly and said, “Just let us know when he abuses someone. Until then we can’t do anything.”

We’ve called and they’ve (falsely) promised to pass by at a specific time (Friday and then again last night), but the majority of the time they flat-out say that they can’t (won’t) do anything. One of the students in our high school shared in prayer group the other day that his 16-year-old sister was held at knifepoint a few days ago as a man from our small rural community tried to rape her, but thankfully she escaped. Their parents went to the police station the next day to report the man (and they know exactly who it was!), but the police said dryly, “We can’t do anything because 24 hours have already passed.” Our 12-year-old daughter Josselyn shared with us last night that her grandfather had raped a young woman many years ago and that the police had put him in jail. For two days.

‘Utter bewilderment’ and ‘rage’ and ‘exhaustion’ do not even begin to describe how Darwin, our kids and I currently feel toward the ‘justice’ system here. Just yesterday as we passed through the nearby city of La Ceiba in our old pickup truck with our 8 kids on our way home from a dentist appointment I read a new billboard, advertising the police, that says, “I called 9-1-1, I filed a complaint, and that was enough (as in, the police then reacted and brought justice to the situation.)” I scoffed and my heart began to fill with a certain rage that is becoming too familiar.

I do not want to become a scoffer, and I am keenly aware that a deep cynicism is threatening to consume me. This morning as I was in the shower – a small trickle of cold water falling over me – I asked the Lord, “What do we do? What would you have us to do?”

It is all too easy to sit around and invent apocalyptic nightmares, imaging the worst-case-scenario, becoming suspicious of everyone, generally giving in to fear and falling in the same pit as nearly everyone else. (The majority of people here fear leaving their homes at night, don’t send their kids on public transportation, build tall, barbed-wire prison-like walls around their homes and live under a very real cloud of constant fear and doom, which go directly against the peace-that-passes-understanding that Christ wants to bestow on us.)

Darwin and I have intentionally swung the other direction and have even begun discerning if we should go to the step-father’s home in a bold but loving confrontation and share with him God’s liberating Word, possibly inviting other Christian neighbors to join us.

So as I stood there, little drops of cold water sliding over my skin in the shower this morning, the only answer I heard immediately and clearly to my question of what-would-the-Lord-have-us-to-do was this: “Be still and know that I am God.”

So please pray with and for us right now, especially in regards to these two cases – Sandra’s step-father who is following and threatening her (and who knows where we live because our town is so small) and the other child molester who has been hiding out along the road to our home/mission and who several concerned students and parents have told me is trying to grab our students on their way to classes each morning. Jesus tells us to pray for our enemies and those who persecute us, so I ask for special prayers of deliverance, repentance and transformation for these two men, whether the Lord chooses to use us as His instruments to confront them or if He reaches them in anther way. Please pray God’s divine protection over all 28 of our students and over Sandra during this time of very real danger. Pray also for the police – that they may be prompted to begin patrolling the 1.2-mile stretch of gravel road that leads up to our property, and that they may actually begin responding to the people’s cries for justice. And, perhaps most importantly of all: pray that the Lord may saturate our hearts and minds with His perfect peace and that we may not fall prey to living in constant fear and dread. May we fear only God Himself and not men!

Amen!

Isaiah 9:1-7 [What we have been studying in our community Bible study]: Nevertheless, that time of darkness and despair will not go on forever…The people who walk in darkness will see a great light. For those who live in a land of deep darkness, a light will shine. You will enlarge the nation of Israel, and its people will rejoice. They will rejoice before you as people rejoice at the harvest and like warriors dividing the plunder. For you will break the yoke of their slavery and lift the heavy burden from their shoulders. You will break the oppressor’s rod…The boots of the warrior and the uniforms bloodstained by war will all be burned. They will be fuel for the fire. For a child is born to us, a son is given to us. The government will rest on his shoulders. And he will be called: Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. His government and its peace will never end. He will rule with fairness and justice from the throne of his ancestor David for all eternity. The passionate commitment of the Lord of Heaven’s Armies will make this happen!

Child/Youth Leadershp, Family, God At Work Among Us, Information About the Mission, Personal Reflection, Special Needs Kids, Teaching

Josselyn’s Living Room Theology Class

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Several of our older kids have begun giving 7-year-olds Gabriela and Josue ‘tutoring’ during different 30-minute afternoon time-slots throughout the week to help stimulate our two littlest ones who are the most developmentally behind schedule. Thus far the classes have been a selection of Play-Doh, P.E. (tossing a ball back-and-forth, doing sprints across our front yard, spinning in circles, etc.), coloring, and playing with wooden blocks. It has been a very rewarding experience for all — perhaps even more so for the tutors than for Gaby and Josue.

This Saturday 11-year-old Josselyn (who is Gabriela’s biological sister and the 7th of our 8 kids to move in with us roughly 7 months ago) was the teacher for the designated tutoring time. She took the initiative to lean a large whiteboard against the wall in our living room and set up two wooden stools for her students. I sat on the floor in our bedroom organizing paperwork with our door open into the living room so that I, too, could ‘sit in’ on the class.

Josselyn, who just learned how to read, write and do basic math for the first time in her life since moving in with us in July 2015, up until Saturday had not been one of our more dynamic tutors. She had generally been in charge of the ‘coloring book’ tutoring sessions and, by what we could tell, had fulfilled her once-a-week class out of nothing more than a sense of duty to her little sister.

But something had changed. On Saturday she began enthusiastically writing the vowels on the whiteboard (which Gaby and Josue have no idea how to read), and soon enough she had them sing-songing the vowels in some catchy tune she had made up. Gaby and Josue were thoroughly engaged in the class, and at some point she even had Gaby counting with her up to 20 (Josue does not talk other than a handful of one- or two-syllable sounds). I felt like a permanent smile was glued on my face as I continued organizing several stacks of legal paperwork, students’ exams, and mission statements as the rest of our kids played in our front yard. My husband Darwin and our eldest daughter, 15-year-old Dayana, were in the nearby city of La Ceiba that morning in their weekly English class.

Far exceeding the 30-minute recommended time, Josselyn then dispatched her students to a short ‘recess,’ telling me with a big grin that she wanted to keep teaching them other subjects even though she didn’t have to. She then informed me quite seriously, “The other tutors don’t know how to manage Josue and Gaby, and that’s why they behave so poorly. But I just tell them that if they don’t listen up and participate, I’ll take their recess away. That seems to work just fine.”

I, too, took a ‘recess’ and crossed our front lawn to the little office building to bring more folders for my organizational efforts. When I crossed the threshold of our front door into our living room several minutes later, I was somewhat startled to hear Josselyn – who had already called her students in from recess and had them sitting obediently on their stools to continue the class – saying in a very even tone with more authority than perhaps I have ever heard her talk, and much less teach: “Of course we are going to die, because we are made of the dust of the earth.”

As I passed by them on my few-yard journey to our bedroom, I looked at Josselyn, intrigued, and she informed me, “Now we’re in Bible class.”

I nodded, very interested to hear what Josselyn-the-teacher (who did not have a Bible in hand) would be instructing her two very immature students on the Truth. (From the psychological evaluations we’ve had done, Gaby is roughly 4 years old mentally/emotionally and Josue is 3, and both suffer intermediate to severe developmental delays due to distinctive situations of abuse they suffered before arriving at our home. Josue is in a special-needs pre-school class at a private school five mornings a week, and this past week we moved Gaby down from first grade in a private school to kindergarten in our own school to help cater her needs.)

A few words about Josselyn: she has very short hair that is just starting to grow out after having arrived at our front gate with nearly buzzed-off hair with huge bald patches, and she is very, very small for her age due to malnutrition suffered in her early childhood (she’s about the size of a 7- or 8-year-old, and nobody knows how old she really is because she doesn’t have a birth certificate and was never registered with the government, although our dentist’s approximation is that she’s 11 or 12 years old).

So I continued organizing my mountain of paperwork, but this time with my mind much more focused on the theology class coming from our living room than on the manila folders in front of me.

Josselyn covered the beginning of Genesis with remarkable accuracy, instructing Gaby and Josue with all authority on themes that she has been learning in our weekly Discipleship Group but that, honestly, I had thought were beyond her. Of our 8 kids/teens, she does not tend to have a lot of questions, prayer requests, or comments during the various Bible studies we participate in each week, and I had (very mistakenly) thought that perhaps she was distracted amidst other thoughts, possibly not even hearing the instruction around her, although she had come to give her life to Christ in one of our community Bible studies a few months ago and we had seen distinct changes in her since then.

As I heard nugget after nugget of profound, God-inspired wisdom flowing easily from her mouth, I quickly realized I needed to be writing it all down so as not to forget her exact words. So, without her realizing it, I grabbed an old notebook from one of the many piles of paperwork around me and I began to scribble in a fat, blue marker as quickly as I could everything that she was teaching. Her words, verbatim, were as follows:

“God is love. He’s the only true love we’ve got. The love of a person is small, but that of God is big – bigger and bigger – and He won’t turn His back on you. Not even your mom loves you as much as He does. And if you repent, He’ll be there. But if we don’t repent, when we die we’ll be in front of God and He’ll say: ‘I don’t know you.’”

After Josselyn had instructed several times and in many different ways that God is love, Josue started echoing her every time she said ‘God,’ him answering with “A-moh!” (his way of saying ‘amor,’ which is ‘love’ in Spanish.) Every time she said ‘God’ in any context, Josue’s little voice echoed: “A-moh…” And I think Josue was onto something: every time we think about God, our knee-jerk reaction should be to meditate on His love.

She continued, changing the subject: “If I tell you to do whatever you want because you run your own life – like, go and have a lot of women — am I a good friend?”

Josue, who wears diapers, answered shyly: “No.”

Josselyn: “Isn’t that right that I’m not? A good friend would tell you to submit to God’s will and give away what you have to people who need it more than you do, and God will bless you.”

She continued: “Life is hard, even for children. A lot of kids can just run around and play, but they don’t even know what they do. But once you arrive in adulthood, things will be harder.” She swings her gaze over to me and confirms: “Right, Jennifer?” I laughed. “One day you two will be big, but you’ve got to start believing in God even now when you’re small. You don’t have to go around fighting – God says let there be peace and freedom, but no fights and wars.”

Josue started to giggle nervously, and Josselyn corrected him: “We don’t have to laugh at God’s Word. This isn’t like ‘A, B, C’ in first grade, Josue – this is the True Word, and I’m not lying.”

Josue shaped up, and she continued, now teaching on the crucifixion, Lazarus, and the end of the world. “Not even the angels know when the end of the world will come, only God – right, Jennifer?”

Her two pupils sat with total focus, listening to their young teacher who, by some miracle, already has God’s Word stitched deeply in her heart. She addressed her students: “Do you have a question about how God is?”

Gaby, stuttering and mispronouncing certain words, as is the way she always talks: “The—the…chapters say that we must love one another.”

Josselyn: “Very well, Gaby, but first we must love God.”

“If I believe I am bigger than God, we are believing Satan, the Father of Lies. If I say I want to be the queen because God’s dead, who’s talking crazy? Me, right? Because I’m from the dust of the Earth, and God is the Father of Truth.”

At some point the class started winding down, and the teacher asked me what time it was. “2:20pm,” I answered.

She laughed out loud and said, “I think I’m gonna keep going until nighttime!”

Community Life, Family, God At Work Among Us, Information About the Mission, Living Waters Ranch Primary School, Living Waters Ranch Secondary School, Music, Personal Reflection

February 2016 Life and Ministry Updates

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First 3 Weeks of Classes in Living Waters Ranch High School and Elementary School a Success

Since the first day of classes on Wednesday, February 3rd we have enjoyed a surprisingly smooth and joyful transition into hosting 30 students ages 8-20 in our home/mission every day Monday-Friday for academic classes (grades 1-7), Bible studies, music and art lessons, etc. The students have said many times that they wish they had to come to classes on Saturdays too!

They start trickling in through our front gate each morning at 6:30am —  (due to our disciplinary system that includes a very detailed contract that each student and their parents signed before enrolling, everyone’s learned quite quickly to be punctual for 7:00am classes!) — and they leave between 1:00-3:30pm each afternoon depending on the specific day of the week.

Please continue to pray that this new outreach would bear much fruit for the Kingdom, and that many children/youth who are not yet willing vessels for God’s love would come to know and submit to Him through the various ways the gospel is taught and lived at the Living Waters Ranch. Pray also that the Lord would grant us wisdom, perseverance, and vision so as to impact the children/youth from our rural neighborhood in the deepest way possible for His glory.

Legal Progress

We’ve received notice from our lawyer that all of our legal paperwork, accounting, organizational reports, etc, from 2011-2015 have been officially received by the Honduras government in the capital city, which is a huge step. That process lasted several months, so now at least we have in hand a signed and stamped copy that proves that our documents have been received and are being processed.

Please continue to pray for God’s hand over this entire process — that the government officials may work effectively and transparently, and that the Lord may grant us peace in the midst of continued waiting.

Brayan Returns to Living Waters Ranch School as Fifth Grade Student

Brayan, our young neighbor who lived under our roof as a son during 8 months and has continued his on-and-off relationship with us since, recently moved back to our rural neighborhood and, after a period of discernment, has been accepted into our discipleship-based elementary school program into a class with four other teen boys five days a week. He is doing incredibly well, and we are all thrilled to have him so close as he continues to grow and develop into a man after God’s own heart.

Let us give thanks to God for all that is happening in Brayan’s life, and pray with us that Brayan’s decision-making would continue following its current pattern.

Dayana (age 15) Begins Teaching Beginners’ Piano

Dayana, the eldest of the 8 children/youth the Lord has placed in our home as sons and daughters, recently began teaching weekly piano lessons to three young neighbors of ours along with 11-year-old Josselyn, one of our 8. In these last few months Dayana has begun taking on many new leadership roles in our home/mission. She is the only one of our kids who is in our 7th-grade Living Waters Ranch High School, and it is exhilarating to see her very quickly and naturally taking on leadership roles among her peers (all 15 of which are from our rural neighborhood), participating more than anyone else in our twice-weekly Bible study, and aiding our new teacher in various ways.

Let us give thanks to God for the ways He is enabling her to develop according to His will, and please pray with us for her continued protection, purity, and joy.

Community Life, Family, God At Work Among Us, Information About the Mission, Living Waters Ranch Secondary School, Personal Reflection

Who’s Next? [A Reflection on Suffering and God’s Sovereignty]

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Yesterday my husband, our high school teacher and I had a meeting with a 16-year-old single mom who is interested in enrolling in our new seventh-grade class.

We sat together around a concrete picnic table under the breezy shade of a tree in our front yard as it was explained to us that she and her one-month-old son moved to our rural town to live with her aunt and uncle after her mother was murdered last month while someone was stealing her cellphone. I didn’t hear all the details on her father’s situation, but he is also dead.

Just three or four days ago my husband informed me that a dear neighbor of ours had received news that his younger brother – a Christian man in his early thirties who lives in Honduras’ capital city – was also murdered recently when someone jumped him for his cellphone.

About two months ago a famous Honduran soccer player in his early twenties was murdered in the parking lot of a small shopping center in the nearby city of La Ceiba that Darwin and I frequent. The night following the murder Darwin and his youth choir held a Christmas recital at the same location.

A few months ago as a family we attended the funeral of a dear friend of ours’ dad, a security guard for a local pawn shop who was gunned down in broad daylight.

Last week as Darwin and I rolled down a rocky street in our 2001 pickup, I asked him casually if so-and-so neighbor, the daughter of an elderly couple we know well, is a single mom. He answered “yes,” and then added that she’s single because someone had killed her husband.

The piercing question — that can neither be answered nor entertained in the slightest if one wants to live with peace – that has been invading my thoughts over these past few days is: “Who’s next?”

The utterly chaotic and unstable situation on Planet Earth is a reality quickly accepted when you live in Honduras. Here there is generally very little white-washing of sin, no careful cloaking of death, no tasteful hiding of the elderly, the sick and morbid behind a safe curtain to shield anyone else from catching sight. Everyone seems to know that death is close and that no one is exempt from being its next victim.

In most cases, the murderers keep on murdering, the thieves keep on stealing until someone kills them (as was the case with a 16-year-old neighbor of ours), and those who break the law in other ways continue doing so because the Justice system. Does. Nothing.

Just last week as I was in the government’s child protective agency’s office in a meeting with one of the agency’s lawyers, a wonderful Christian woman with whom we hold a very positive relationship, I asked about 7-year-old Gabriela’s step-father’s court proceedings, a naïve hope for resolution permeating my question. The lawyer, knowing all too well the system in which we find ourselves here, let out a sigh and informed me that the specific investigative branch that was in charge of looking into the stepfather’s case had been shut down. The government, in hopes of perhaps creating a ‘better’ investigative branch, opened up a different operation only to put all the previous cases so far back that it wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that they are ‘out of sight and out of mind,’ meaning that Gabriela’s stepfather, who took her as if she were his adult lover and openly proclaimed to others that she was such, is loose – at large, not behind bars – and may very well never receive any earthly consequence for his pervertedness, seeing as the new cases have taken precedence over the old and now 7 months have passed since he should have been caught in the first place. It is what they had promised us.

For a few moments, all hope, all energy drained out of my body as I could do no more than stare at the lawyer lifelessly, wanting to slip away into some other reality, full of rage but at the same time sucked dry by a sorrow so strong that I almost felt as if I could not move. Everything within me seemed suddenly paralyzed, while the following thought methodically stamped itself across my mind:

He’s…probably…found…another…                      …and…

My thoughts came to a standstill at this conclusion, everything tuning dizzy and dark – I mean, why would he not? With no pending consequence, no apparent court case or investigation, no police searching for him, no repentance that we know of, why not find another little girl and continue unfazed?

My thoughts — suddenly both slowed and sharpened by an acute emotional exhaustion — began: How could this possibly be happening? Who’s next? Wh-who will be the next little girl to have her world smashed to pieces, slamming her behind mentally and emotionally, perhaps for the rest of her life? Gaby wetting her pants so frequently — so, so, SO behind in every sense of the word, hours and hours of holding her, praying over her for restoration — the gargantuan although imperfect effort that has been made to give Gaby a sense of ‘normal,’ all the talks to teach her that taking her clothes off and dancing sensually in front of others isn’t God’s plan for her, and…and – there’s probably another little girl out there, who –

If it is said that Jesus is a man of sorrows, well-acquainted with the profoundest of grief, with each passing day He is giving me a deeper glimpse into why that is so.

So that afternoon as I drove up the lonely gravel road toward our rural property speckled with little melon-colored buildings, I raised my eyes to the mountainous backdrop before me and began praying the only words that seemed to make any sense: “Come, Lord Jesus. Come. May Your kingdom come, Your will be done, one Earth as it is in heaven. Come, Lord Jesus. Please come.”

Replete with exhaustion, the gaping hole in my chest allowed for a sudden flooding-in of praises toward our Father God who is just, who is trustworthy, and who stands in such raw, utter contrast to all that is wrong in our world, all that is wrong in me. So, against all logic my heart let out a welp of joy – a desperate cry for hope – as my eyes travelled up the mountains before me, taken to such depths of sorrow that the Lord lifted me up to some new perspective of His sovereignty, His perfect justice in the face of what can only be classified as bewilderingly tragic unfairness — total, inexplicable lunacy.

So when I climbed out of our pickup and entered our dining room, little Gaby turned around from where she was sitting at the table to greet me with a big smile, her face painted like a kitten.

From that moment on I believe I lost my patience with anyone and everyone, snapping here and there at Darwin and the kids as I felt that I was on the verge of exploding from the inside out. It wasn’t until over dinner that I asked each person individually for forgiveness and, for better or worse, wept in front of the kids and shared with them the news of Gaby’s stepfather (which, of course, is the news of nothing at all, more of the same). Some of our kids looked appropriately intrigued at seeing me utterly undone, while others looked moved toward a compassion I had not yet seen in them, but I believe all of them understood: Our hope is not and cannot be in this world.

In the days following I have had several similar episodes of sorrow, weeping, and praise. If I didn’t know the end of the story (Christ’s total victory over sin and death), I know that personally I could not continue in this work because, from our human perspective, perhaps no territory is being gained at all. We’re just losing time and resources, wasting our lives on a fight that simply cannot be won. But – against all logic, I continue to raise my eyes to the mountains before me as my spirit cries out: “Come, Lord Jesus. Come now. May Your kingdom come, may Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Without You, nothing makes sense. Come.”

Community Life, Family, God At Work Among Us, Information About the Mission, Living Waters Ranch Secondary School, Marriage, Personal Reflection

That Makes Eight

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Yesterday around 5:00pm several of our kids were out in our large front yard playing soccer with our neighbors while others were playing board games in our house and our eldest was giving a beginners’ piano class to two young neighbors in our school building. I began to dish out the rice and beans, pasta, and chocolate cake for dinner after a surprisingly productive afternoon in which all of our kids wowed me with their initiative and finished all their homework with excellence before 3:30pm.

When it comes to serving food in our home, you’ve got to be good at math.

Whenever the time comes to take out the cups, plates and forks, you’ve got to do a quick mental head-count of who will be eating: Dayana and Jackeline are out at church with such-and-such local family, so that’s 7 kids – 2 that are not currently present = 5 kids that will be eating here + Darwin and I, so that’s 7 of everything. Got it.

Or: Today for the twice-weekly community lunch/Bible study, we’ll be serving food for the 12 students in elementary school + 16 from high school (but Arnold didn’t come today because he’s sick, so that makes 15) + the 2 teachers + Miss Martha + Darwin and I + our 2 middle-aged neighbors who will be attending + our other 5 kids who are out at school but will be home in about an hour and will need to eat + perhaps 6 other young neighbors who might show up = about 45. Does anyone have a calculator?!

But last night, seeing as our kids, Darwin and I were home together and Miss Martha and the other laborers, students, neighbors, etc had all left by 3:00pm (as they do each day Monday-Friday), I put my mind on autopilot and began taking out 9 of everything, which has been our magic number since July when Josselyn and Gabriela moved in. 7 kids + 2 adults.

As I began lining up all the plates on our kitchen counter, however, something felt odd. I counted the plates again. Yup; 9 plates. 7 kids + 2 adults, right? 7 kids…My mind wandered around somewhat confused until the still-very-new thought hit me: No! Now they’re 8 kids! Ha! That’s what was missing. Our new ‘magic number’ is 10. I quickly added an additional plate, and suddenly everything seemed to make sense.

A couple months ago our 12-year-old daughter Jackeline, who has now been in our family a full year, made a comment to me in a silly tone of voice: “If any new kids arrive in our family in this next year, I sure hope they’re younger than me.” I had laughed and – thoroughly convinced myself – assured her that I did not think more kids would be arriving in this next year or two, seeing as our hearts and schedules were already quite full with 7.

Well, Jackeline’s wish didn’t come true.

Last Thursday, our second day of classes with all of our elementary and secondary students who now study in our home/mission 5 days a week, one of our new 7th-grade students approached us for prayer after Bible study. My husband, the two teachers (Miss Isis and Miss Ligia), and I sat around her in our dining room as she began sharing with us her concern for her mother’s health. As we asked careful questions, she continued to open up until the root of the issue was exposed: her step-father is physically and sexually abusive (and has been for the last 6 years), putting her life in very real danger and causing tremendous stress and pain to her mother as well. The mother had gone to the police several times, explaining the situation and filing official reports, but, as is frequently the case here, nothing had been done. As the story continued to unravel — taking on the horrific shape of so many others we’ve heard too many times — I felt a very strong prompting in my chest from the Lord, so I asked to speak to my husband in private before continuing with the conversation/prayer.

He and I walked briskly outside and I told him: “Gabriela and Josselyn were rescued out of this exact kind of situation. I feel that God wants us to offer her refuge,” and he immediately confirmed. Our conversation must have lasted all of 19 seconds; we then re-entered the dining room, offered her the invitation to escape the abuse by coming to live with us, and she told us that she would talk with her mom and let us know. We prayed with her – for her mom, for her step-father, for God’s will to be done.

Several days passed, and then on Tuesday of this week she approached me with a large grin on her face, asking to talk with Darwin and me. My heart leapt and sunk all at the same time – guessing quite accurately what she would be telling us – and, sure enough, she informed us that she and her mom had discussed it and that her mom wanted to take us up on the offer of refuge for her daughter because she truly is in danger with her step-father.

So, phone calls were made, a meeting with the local government-run child protective agency’s office was made, we signed all the documents with the lawyer, the psychological evaluation was completed, and yesterday morning (Thursday) as she came walking up our long gravel road in her school uniform to attend classes, she brought with her an additional grocery bag filled with all of her belongings.

Her name is Sandra, and she’s 15 years old. Darwin and I are already in communication with her mom to see what more can be done with the official complaints the mother has filed with the police, although right now our hope in the system of justice here on earth (and especially in Honduras) is realistically dim. In the coming weeks/months we will continue to be in contact with her mom to see what plan of escape or new beginning can be made for the mom and her other three children (all of which are biological children of the stepdad and who, for that reason, he treats well), although we still do not have many details or much information at all.

Please pray with us not only for her adjustment to living in our home, but also for the mom’s protection and step-father’s salvation and transformation. Sandra and her mom are both authentic Christians, very humble, and have a very real understanding of and love for God’s Word. Please pray that the Lord’s hand would be over this entire situation/process and that, if possible, Sandra can be reunited with her mom in the right timing and once the familial situation is no longer dangerous.

So, yesterday 12-year-old Jackeline (the same one who didn’t want another older sister to push her down the totem pole) enthusiastically took Sandra out to our rural property’s mango tree, to the little stream behind our home, and traipsing around here and there, giving her new ‘big sister’ a genuine welcome. Sandra’s face shined with joy as our other girls took her out to play soccer; I fixed up her bed with clean sheets and a hand-written welcome note, 8-year-old Jason asked me sheepishly to introduce him to the newest of his now-6 sisters, and I prepared 8 tupperware containers with our kids’ snacks for school today instead of the traditional 7. Thanks to the mysteries of God’s perfect will, the entire transition has seemed surprisingly light-hearted and even fun.

So, of our 8 kids/teens, some of them consider us to be their authentic parents while others view us as loving mentor-figures the Lord has placed in their path. Some call us ‘Ma’ and ‘Pa’ without hesitation while others call us by our first names. Some may be reunited with their blood families if it is God’s will, whereas others may be officially adopted into the ‘Canales-Zilly’ household if the Lord permits it.

Lines are blurry, but everyone is growing in grace.

If someone asks us how many sons and daughters we have, I don’t know if we should answer “7 with 1 honored guest” (because Sandra may very well return to her mother soon if the situation with the step-father is taken care of) or if everyone is automatically included, making it 8 without thinking twice. Lines will doubtlessly become blurrier if and when we have any biological children, but of this I am convinced: the Lord is forming us into a tribe, a people after His own heart. He is erasing divisions created by Man; He is uniting us by Jesus’ blood rather than our own, calling us home to His eternal family that is formed by those who submit themselves to the Good Father’s will. And by some act of miraculous grace, He is enabling our stubborn mouths to freely proclaim: “Father, may Your will be done, not mine…”

Glory to God!

Family, God At Work Among Us, Personal Reflection

Gabriela’s ‘Theater’ of Reality: What Is Said When No One’s Listening

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A few days ago in the late afternoon I was in our bedroom folding clothes and putting away loose papers as I eavesdropped on little Gabriela and Josue’s conversation through our open windows. Immediately outside of two of our windows lies our front porch, from which typically come shouts of joy and squeals and too-loud play on the five hammocks we’ve strung up.

On this occasion, rather than swinging somewhat mindlessly on the hammocks and shouting greetings to me through the window, roughly 7-year-old Gabriela was carefully instructing Josue (who is her age but suffers several developmental disabilities most likely due to abuse in his infancy) that they were to play ‘Ma and Pa.’

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Gabriela, our little popcorn kernel who’s been in our home since July 2015, toying with the shore on a recent family trip to a local beach

 

Thrilled to hear that she was using her imagination and likewise intrigued at how ‘Ma and Pa’ would play out, I kept folding and putting away clothes with one ear very intentionally tuned in to the little drama that was unfolding just yards away.

As their voices faded in and out, I could hear her coaching Josue on how they would prepare dinner for the kids, and then she told him that it was time to put the kids to sleep. I focused hard through other distracting noises – dogs outside, other kids moving about, etc – to hear how her view of bedtime would play out in her make-believe (yet very real) world, especially when she thought no one else was listening.

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‘Ma’ Gabriela said to ‘daughter’ Gabriela: “Ok, Gabriela, time to go to sleep. We will pray with you and sing for you.”

My heart smiled because that is, in fact, what we do with her nearly every night.

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Then: “We love you.”

In Spanish (which is the language my husband, kids and I communicate in) there are two different forms of “I love you.” There is a much more commonly used form that can be used in friendships and not-so-intimate relationships (Te quiero), and then there is the much more personal form that is very rarely used because (in my opinion) it is so powerful (Te amo). Darwin and I use the more powerful version with one another and with our kids to communicate God’s intensely personal love for them, but even our kids do not typically respond with the stronger version but rather the more ‘tame’ love. For example, I’ll say: “Good night, Dayana. I (strong, deep) love you,” and she’ll respond joyfully: “I (less intense, more common) love you, too, Ma.” I think only two or three times in these two years of parenting one of our kids has said that they love anyone (among siblings, other family members, to Darwin and I, etc) using the stronger version, and even then it was written in a card rather than spoken because (I imagine) it just seems too risky.

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So that afternoon as I eavesdropped on Gabriela’s ‘theater’ of her own reality, the power of her statement to ‘herself’ almost took my breath away, because she used the almost-forbidden-because-it’s-so-strong version of “I love you,” which is the version we use with her but that I have never heard leave her lips before. On a normal day she’ll follow me around the house proclaiming, “I love you, Ma!” with the less-intense version, and I’ll stop and give her hugs or kisses or pick her up and then she’ll keep on professing her ‘love’ for me, but always with the friendly, less-personal version of love.

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So when I heard her innocent play-time “I love you,” my heart sunk into a deep pool of gratitude, my thoughts immediately swept up in: She knows. She really knows – understands – that we love her. Thank you, Lord. Amidst all of our trials with her, the times when she wants to sit in my lap but it’s already occupied by someone else, the times when my attitude screams impatience or when I feel inadequate to meet her many, many needs – even amidst all the discipline and correction, she really, really knows. Thank you, Lord. Please keep showing her Your love for her through us, however imperfect we are. We love her because You do. Thank you.

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Family, God At Work Among Us, Personal Reflection

The Great Pyramid of Daughters

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When you’ve got enough daughters to start making a legitimate human pyramid, you know you’re in a class of your own…

Cheers to Dayana (15), Jackeline (12), Gleny (11), Josselyn (11) and Gabriela (7). We adore these five daughters of the King and are astonished at the magnitude of the good work the Lord has begun in each of their lives in such a short time.

I think the three on the bottom finally understood the benefits of all the pushups, frog-jumps and wind-sprints I tend to make them do…We were preparing for this:

The Great Pyramid of Daughters

(with the help of one faithful dad)…

 

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After having taken these pictures on a family outing to the beach this past Saturday, I reflected with my husband on the symbolism of these photos that jumps out at me: the three on the bottom of the pyramid, who have all been with us 1-2 years, serve as the sturdy base for the newer building blocks — the two biological sisters on top who’ve been with us 6 months. And, as is the case in our daily rhythms of life, Gabriela is the one who needs constant help, support and encouragement, so it is suiting that in the photos Darwin is physically holding her up. Furthermore, it is noteworthy that Darwin — a man — is the one present to help them build their structure, as is Father God in all of our lives. After having been abused, abandoned and mistreated by other father figures in their lives, finally a man with God’s own heart is placed alongside of them to hold them up as Father God continues to strengthen them — each person in their correct place, working together to keep one another from falling — according to His good will…

And, of course, there is struggle and laughter throughout the journey…

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Child/Youth Leadershp, Family, Girls' Youth Basketball, God At Work Among Us, Information About the Mission, Living Waters Ranch Primary School, Living Waters Ranch Secondary School, Music, Special Needs Kids, Teaching

February Third is the Big Day! (January 2016 Ministry Updates)

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Students Enrolled in Discipleship-Based Secondary School

After beginning with 40+ candidates for our new 7th-grade section of secondary school that we will begin teaching five days a week at the Living Waters Ranch, we now have 15 students ages 11-17 from our rural neighborhood along with our eldest daughter who have fulfilled all the enrollment requirements, attended the mandatory meetings with their parent(s), brought all their documents, signed the student contract, etc.

About half of the students already have a relationship with us through their participation in choir, Bible study, agriculture, etc, and the other half are completely new to us as they simply responded to our announcement in the local schools or heard about the program through a neighbor.

The parents of the students who have officially enrolled are thrilled at our rather simple, God-fearing program (which includes several weekly Bible studies, musical involvement, a family-like atmosphere, and very clear, Biblical norms), because the educational experience that many have had in the public institutions has been that of classrooms with 45+ students per teacher, students with 25+ absences who still ‘pass’ their grade, used condoms littering the playground, sixth grade classrooms in which a great percentage of the kids still don’t know how to read, zero art or music classes, absentee or uncommitted teachers, etc.

Please pray for us, the 7th-grade teacher (Miss Ligia), the students and their families during this time of newness, continued decision-making, etc, as we finish preparations of the new classroom, continue designing the extracurricular activities and training the teacher (who has never taught before because she is a lawyer), put into practice school norms, etc. Pray that each activity, effort, conversation, etc, may be centered on God’s will and pleasing to Him. May Christ continually be made known in and through us to the students, parents, and among those of us who are laboring at the Ranch.

All the teens will be arriving at our front gate in their uniforms for their first day of school on Wednesday, February 3rd!

 

Jackeline (12) and Gabriela (7) Accepted into New School

This past month has been filled with many surprises, one of which is that after an entrance exam/evaluation, both Jackeline (our 12-year-old daughter who just celebrated one year of living in our family along with her 7-year-old special needs brother) and Gabriela (our 7-year-old popcorn kernel who’s been buzzing around our home for six months now along with her 11-year-old sister) were accepted into the same private Christian elementary school that Jason (8) and Gleny (11) were in last year and will be entering again this upcoming week to start a new school year.

So, four of our seven kids will all be in the same school, which we are thrilled about. Jackeline and Gleny will be classmates in the school’s only fifth grade class with roughly 12-14 students, and Jason will be in third grade and Gabriela in first. It was a long shot for the school to accept Jackeline (and an even longer shot for them to accept Gabriela, who is behind developmentally due to severe abuse), so I gave a big hug to the school’s director when she gave me the good news! We earnestly give thanks to God for this wonderful opportunity for both of them to be in a truly loving, disciplined school environment everyday where they can learn and grow alongside of peers their age, seeing as the elementary school we have at the Living Waters Ranch is geared toward literacy in older students and, although it could work for them, may not be the most effective option.

Everything seems a bit hectic (in a good sense) as we are in the process of buying school uniforms, PE uniforms, sizing up school shoes, making several trips to local office supply stores for notebooks, compasses, rulers, etc, meeting teachers and school directors, and organizing transportation for each child. Everyone (including Josue, who will be returning to his special needs school in the nearby city of La Ceiba and Dayana and Josselyn, who will continue their education at the Living Waters Ranch) will be entering school on Wednesday, February 3!

Please pray for Jackeline and Gabriela’s adjustment to a new school environment, and that their behavior and attitudes would be honoring to God. Pray for their overall self-discipline and effort, that they would take this opportunity as the blessing that it is and use it to grow further into the Lord’s will for their life.

 

Community Lunch and Bible Study to be Held Twice Weekly

In September 2015, we began holding a once-weekly community lunch and Bible study in our dining room, and we’ve seen much fruit from this initiative to share God’s Word with our neighbors. After receiving confirmation from several people that we should begin holding it twice a week, we have decided to begin doing so on February 3rd along with the commencement of a new year of primary and secondary school, choir activities, etc.

We have several elderly neighbors who attend along with some middle-aged married couples and several children and youth from our neighborhood, plus all of the primary and secondary students who will participate as part of their school curriculum. We are excited and honored to be able to share God’s Word with our neighbors who attend because the majority of which don’t attend church or hear the Word of God in any other place. Please pray that the Lord would continue to provide inspiration and guide the discussions/teachings that we prepare, and that those who participate would truly be persuaded toward the Truth.

 

Child/Youth Leadership Program and Basketball Team in Local School

This past month I returned to my part-time assignment in La Ceiba’s Episcopal School to continue training/guiding the children and youth there in God’s Word.

I have renamed the “Gifted and Talented Program” in two different sections: “Child Leadership” (4th-5th grade) and “Youth Leadership” (6th-7th grade), both of which meet weekly and are targeted at raising up leaders in the next generation who are founded on Christ. I have had basically the same group of students for three years now, so I am very excited and honored to see the work the Lord will continue to etch out among us. In addition, I am continuing to coach the (now co-ed) basketball team at the same school for the fourth year in a row, with students ages 8-15. Our eldest daughter (Dayana, age 15 in 7th grade) participates weekly in the Youth Leadership program, and five of our kids (Dayana, Gleny, Jason, Jackeline and Josselyn) participate in the co-ed basketball team.

 

Blossoming Relationship with Isis, our Primary Education Teacher

Our relationship with Miss Isis, our 22-year-old Honduran teacher who runs the elementary-section of our government-registered school program at the Living Waters Ranch (1st-6th grade for older students who are behind academically), has truly been one of the biggest surprises of these past six months.

She began working alongside of us in August as a temporary help when our sister Jenae Matikke felt called to move to the nearby city of La Ceiba, and it quickly became apparent that the Lord had great plans to accomplish both in and through her at the Living Waters Ranch. She worked three days per week the last five months of 2015, and for the duration of 2016 she has a contract to labor five days per week in teaching, discipleship, and general care-giving.

On Wednesday, February 3rd she will receive her 12 students (one of which is our daughter, Josselyn, and the other 11 of which are neighbors from our rural neighborhood ages 8-20) for their first day of classes after having spent the entire month of January in preparation, planning, design of her new classroom, meetings/interviews with potential students, etc.

The Lord has also guided her to design and begin leading a new weekly Bible study geared at small children, which is different from the other twice-weekly Bible study we will be teaching for older participants. This will also start on February 3. Let us give thanks for her life and for her willingness to serve the Lord’s purposes!

Community Life, Family, Farm Life, God At Work Among Us, Homeschool, Information About the Mission, Marriage, Music, Personal Reflection, Special Needs Kids

An Unorganized List of 64 Small Miracles: the Year 2015 in Review

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[This is the same list that was published in our January 2016 printed newsletter.]

In similar fashion to the list made roughly a year ago as I looked back over the year 2014, I recently sat down to scribble what I could remember about the year 2015, taking time to give thanks for everything from anniversaries to unforeseen struggles, from growth to sickness, from new initiatives to new sons and daughters, and all that lies in between. Below is our little list that summarizes our walk with the Lord during this past calendar year.

  1. We celebrated our 2-year anniversary with Dayana (15), Gleny (11) and Jason (8), biological siblings who were the first of seven to begin moving into our home roughly four months after Darwin and I were married in 2013.

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2. In January Darwin, the three aforementioned siblings, and I traveled to the southern extremity of Honduras (roughly 9+ hours away) on a water project to share the good news of Christ alongside of our faith community for a week in a rural town, fulfilling a goal of ours to serve as a family in a short-term mission.

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  1. I returned for another water project/faith mission in November to continue visiting homes and sharing the good news of Christ in a different southern village.
  1. Jackeline (age 11) and her special-needs brother Josue (age 6) moved into our home in January for what was supposed to be 3-4 months, but due to their biological mother’s instability are still with us almost a year later and, amidst many trials, are thriving.

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  1. Darwin’s neighborhood youth choir grew and stabilized, averaging between 20-25 youth in its first full calendar year of existence, four of which have come to accept the Lord through their relationship with us. The choir held three public music concerts in our home/mission (the Living Waters Ranch) for our neighbors in addition to having travelled to a local mall, school and nursing home to give free concerts.

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  1. In September we began hosting a weekly community lunch and Bible study in our dining room, receiving 30-35 people each Wednesday ages 5-70+, including several married couples. We will begin holding this Bible study two days a week instead of one beginning in January 2016 due to the fruit we’ve seen in this effort to proclaim the Truth.
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Mr. and Mrs. Santos, neighbors who attend Bible study and whose cows frequent our property to graze

 

  1. Josselyn (age 10) and her younger sister Gabriela (age 6) moved into our home in July after having been rescued out of two distinct situations of sexual abuse, and both have adapted exceptionally well to the rhythms of family life.

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  1. Jackeline (now 12) and Josselyn (10) came to profess faith in Jesus Christ.
  1. Josselyn entered homeschool in August on the kindergarten level (due to the fact that her biological family had never put her in school) and went from not knowing her ABCs to being able to read and write coherently on a basic level in 5 months.
  1. The eldest of the children the Lord has placed in our home to love and guide as sons and daughters, Dayana, turned 15 years old and graduated 6th grade, finishing her ‘elementary’ studies and transitioning into Honduran high school (7th grade), which is a big step that many Hondurans do not reach.

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  1. Gleny (age 11) and Jason (age 8), Dayana’s two younger biological siblings, entered a private Christian elementary school for the first time after having been homeschooled during their first year with us, and both passed their grade with an average of 78% after many, many trials. They will be entering 5th and 3rd grade, respectively, in February 2016.
  1. We received 10 illiterate youth from our rural neighborhood into our 3-day-per-week school program, and we finished the year with 3 of them still standing after the other 7 dropped out due to extreme irresponsibility and bad choices.

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  1. On a chance encounter in a local high school, we met Miss Martha, a middle-aged Honduran Christian who since June has been laboring alongside of us 5 days per week as our nurse, cook, and general caretaker of the littlest kids.
  1. Miss Martha’s daughter, Isis, who is in her early twenties, began laboring alongside of us three days per week in August as our elementary school teacher, and our relationship with her has blossomed such that she has begun to work with us five days per week as of January 2016.
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Miss Martha, our nurse and cook, along with her husband, daughter (Isis, our elementary school teacher) and Isis’ daughter, Isabella. All three adults have been of tremendous support, friendship and encouragement as brothers and sisters in Christ.

 

  1. We received two married couples from the States in our home for a week to share testimonies and support the Lord’s work among us.
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Sharing testimonies on the porch with Kim and Jim Liffick from Texas

 

  1. Our eldest daughter, Dayana, began teaching music lessons with Darwin in a local high school one day per week and directing the beginner-level recorder class at the Living Waters Ranch for a small group of young neighbors.
  1. We hired part-time help with cleaning and maintenance due to necessity.

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  1. We have lost contact with Brayan (the young man who lived in our home for 8 months in 2014 and who continued to be like a son to us after having moved out) since August. [After writing this list in early January he actually came to visit us unexpectedly and is doing very well.]
  1. We have continued weekly participation in our faith community’s Discipleship Group every Sunday, and the 7 kids/youth the Lord has placed in our family have been present and participated each time we go.
  1. Darwin and I celebrated two years of marriage in June.

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  1. After almost three years of being processed by lawyers and government officials, more steps were taken toward the (hopefully close) reality of receiving my Honduran residency status.
  1. Currently several years into my battle with insomnia, sleeping on average 2-4 nights per week, all treatments (including weekly acupuncture, IVs, injections, and prescription and natural sleeping aids) were discontinued in June. No change – whether positive or negative – has been noted since then, seeing as I still spend the majority of nights wide awake, which leads to exhaustion, irritability, migraines and physical weakness almost every day.
  1. Our eldest daughter, Dayana, began taking violin lessons, and continues in piano, recorder, and voice.

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  1. Our two young cows gave birth to healthy calves, one male and one female, and Darwin milked both mommas every morning so that we didn’t have to buy milk and certain cheese products at the grocery store. We have also been able to bless several neighbors and our faith community with raw, organic milk on many occasions.

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  1. A relationship was established with a local supermarket to receive surplus goods for free 1-4 times per month, depending on availability.
  1. I had extended bouts with Dengue Fever, two strains of Typhoid Fever, several undiagnosed tropical fevers, two ear infections, and strep throat.
  1. Many, many (many) mistakes were made and learned from.

28. I celebrated three years of living in Honduras in June.

  1. I travelled to the States in June for the first time in two-and-a-half years to visit with many individuals and churches to share the testimony of the Lord’s work in and through us.
  1. A local family moved to a small house on our property in September in order for their four school-aged children to attend our school. The father works as the night-watchman, and the mother is involved in our weekly Bible study and helps out as a volunteer in our kitchen.
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Miss Carminda (center) along with 6 of her children, 4 of which are students in our school and all of which are involved in various capacities in the mission. This is the family that lives on our property with us and whose father (who is not present in the photo) is the night watchman.
  1. Another year was joyfully spent without air-conditioning, hot water, television, a washing machine, dishwasher or internet in our home.
  1. Many parenting books were read and put into practice, at times with surprising efficacy and at others with quite a few stumbles along the way.
  1. I held a Biblically-based sex education class for 16 women in our rural community ages 10-32, two of which are single moms.
  1. The vision was received and concrete steps taken to add a ‘secondary’ section onto our ‘elementary’ school in the Living Waters Ranch’s education building. Announcements were made in two local elementary schools, candidates were interviewed, a meeting with the parents was held, and the 7th-grade teacher’s contract was written and signed. Orientations and classes will begin in February 2016.
  1. Four neighbors of ours (the children of the night watchman, ages 15, 14, 11 and 8) learned how to read, write and do basic math for the first time in their lives in our school program along with attending weekly Bible study, agriculture classes, and participating in Darwin’s choir and recorder lessons.

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  1. Our two eldest daughters participated in weekly art classes the majority of the calendar year, culminating in a public art exposition in the nearby city of La Ceiba in December.
  1. Many limits and norms were created and put into practice among our family and our many neighbors who frequent the Living Waters Ranch for school, Bible study, work projects, play, counsel or prayer, choir and music lessons, etc, so as to achieve greater focus, efficiency and respect.

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  1. Close to a dozen youth were employed each Monday morning (the majority of whom also participate in Darwin’s choir, Bible study, our school, etc) in supervised agricultural work projects.

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  1. A leadership-focused class I teach for 4th-6th graders a the local Episcopal School was given weekly from January-May with an event for my students and their families held in our home/mission at the culmination of the school year.

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40. Darwin turned 32 years old; I turned 25.

  1. Several messages were taught during the high-schoolers’ ‘church’ time in the local Episcopal School from January-May.
  1. We acquired a new lawyer, with whom we have advanced considerably in a rather sticky legal situation we are in with government taxes, reports, property declarations, etc, that have not been processed since before the passing of the Living Waters Ranch’s founder, Teresa Devlin, in 2012.
  1. Our office/storage room has been moved from the school building to the hospitality house and considerably organized in order to make room for the new 7th grade classroom.

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  1. We took a trip to Tegucigalpa, the country’s capital and biggest metropolitan city with over a million inhabitants that lies 7+ hours from our home, with the three siblings (Dayana, Gleny and Jason) to visit the big national university, go to a zoo, explore a mountaintop, and celebrate our 2-year anniversary together as family.
  1. Josue (currently age 7) entered a special needs school in June and, even amidst many, many difficulties with transportation to get him to and from his school that lies 30+ minutes from our home, he attended classes from June until classes ended in late November, improving his overall conduct, sociability, and basic lifeskills.
  1. Many, many parent-teacher meetings were attended between Gabriela and Josue’s special needs school and Jason and Gleny’s Christian elementary school.

47. Gabriela entered into Josue’s same pre-school level class due to developmental delays that she incurred through severe abuse. She attended five days per week from September onward, quickly becoming the teacher’s ‘assistant.’ She’s learned the colors and has put into practice many common manners that she didn’t have before!

  1. Healthy relationships have been intentionally cultivated with several local families.
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Miss Alma (center), who labors alongside us and who actively participates in Bible study, with her husband, 4 of her children and grandson. Her three boys are being discipled by Darwin, participate in the youth choir, and will be entering our school in February 2016

 

  1. Our three beloved guard dogs died in a tragic accident, and a few months later were replaced with a Rottweiler, German Shepherd mix, and a Hound mix.
  1. The last of our laying chickens and ducks were given away to neighbors after several devastating robberies, and our large chicken shed was converted into a stable for Darwin’s cows.
  1. The small vegetable gardens that Darwin and the local youth cultivate in agriculture classes gave small harvests of radishes and cucumbers after several difficulties, including bad soil or bad seeds, droughts, etc.

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  1. Our dear sister Jenae Matikke moved out of our home/mission in August after having labored alongside of us almost two years. She has begun working alongside of a couple pastors in the nearby city of La Ceiba.

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  1. Darwin, four of our seven children, and myself were granted the grace of fasting as a family in obedience to God towards the end of the calendar year.
  1. Monthly budgets, plans, and goals were written, altered, expanded, and re-written several times.
  1. Many, many conflicts, explosive situations, and emotional encounters among our 7 kids were confronted, prayed and talked through, and dealt with for God’s glory. I can honestly say that we are currently experiencing a season of peace in our household!

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  1. 86 blog posts were written on our site www.HiddenTreasuresinHonduras.wordpress.com with the purpose of encouraging others with the proclamation of the Lord’s Truth in and through us.
  1. 34 blog posts were written on our Spanish blog site to encourage Spanish speakers in the same way.
  1. Our 7 kids have enjoyed thoroughly good health, save several bouts with lice, numerous fungus infections that are common in our tropical climate, and Gabriela’s broken collarbone.
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Fighting lice the fun way… with mayonnaise!

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  1. Our 8-year-old Jason discovered a passion for reading, which is extremely uncommon in this culture and especially for someone his age. Many of the teenage youth who frequent our home cannot even read a complete sentence, while Jason devours books on science, the Bible, and general kids’ literature in his free time.

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  1. About halfway through the year Darwin began discipling a group of 4-8 teen and pre-teen boys every Wednesday morning, training them physically in activities like long-distance running, soccer, and swimming, along with reading God’s Word with them and discussing themes like sexual purity, God’s will for their lives, etc.
  1. I died my hair black in May, as did many light-haired women in our area, in response to a conflict between two rivalry gangs that led to the killing of some women with light-colored hair.
  1. The situation with our absentee trashman was finally fixed after roughly 2-3 months of not getting our trash picked up by anyone, and we now currently have a good relationship with another local man who comes to our home weekly to empty our big trash bin.
  1. Many, many hours were dedicated to the reading of God’s Word with our 7 children plus those from our local community.
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Our sister Kailin Craft reading the Word with our son Jason when she and her husband came to visit in Spring 2015

 

64. Our 2001 Toyota Tacoma cab-and-a-half pickup truck survived its first full year with us after monthly visits to the ‘doctor’ (the mechanics), and transported many kids to and from school, art classes, music concerts, meetings, etc.

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This is a light load — sometimes we travel with 20-25 people!

 

Family, God At Work Among Us, Information About the Mission, Personal Reflection

What I Want to do When I Grow Up

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Seeing as our 7 kids/teens are currently on their school vacation, each day they have about 4-6 ‘homework’ assignments from me to keep them occupied and growing. The tasks to be completed typically include a few chapters from the Bible, 1-4 hours of musical practice, several pages in their math/Spanish workbooks, physical exercises, creative writing prompts, etc. A few days ago I assigned 2 pages of free-writing to our older kids, instructing them to write whatever they wanted as long as they blessed me with good grammar.

Without working together, two of our preteen girls (Jackeline, 12 and Gleny, 11), both of which will be entering 5th grade at the beginning of a new Honduran school year next month, wrote on the same subject: “What I Want to do when I Grow Up.” Although their lists were much longer that what is included on this post, here are some of their independent thoughts on what they want for their futures…

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Jackeline (age 12):

  1. I want to marry Derbin [a young teen in choir and Bible study with her whom she’s had a crush on for the last several months]. I’m being realistic.
  2. I want to have children and be a good mom.
  3. I want to know God more.
  4. I want to meet my biological dad.
  5. I want my children to sleep in bunk beds.
  6. I want my husband to work on a boat.
  7. I want to wash my clothes by hand.
  8. I want to adopt two children.
  9. I want a blue house.
  10. I want my husband to wear elegant clothes except when he’s going to play because I know it’s my job to wash out all those stains.
  11. I want my husband to have hair.
  12. I want to work in a hospital.
  13. I want to teach my children about God, and I want them to pray with me.
  14. I want to help a school.
  15. I want to go to a museum.
  16. I want to be able to spend alone time with Derbin, or whoever my husband is if it’s not him.

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Gleny (age 11):

  1. I want to be a stay-at-home mom.
  2. I want to go to Russia or Italy.
  3. I want to marry the man the Lord would have for me.
  4. I want to go to church.
  5. I want my house to be in total silence at night.
  6. I want for there to be no telephones, computers, etc, at dinnertime.
  7. I want those in my household to watch only one hour of television per day.
  8. I want my husband to be Christian and to be a child of God.
  9. I want to have a job like artist, restaurant worker, beautician, lawyer, or PE teacher.
  10. I want that by 5:00pm all work must be done and put away for the day. [This is a new rule that Darwin and I have for ourselves in our household.]
  11. I want my sons/daughters to go to the same school that I go to (Children of the Light elementary school) if it  still exists.
  12. I want my children to get married when they are 21 years old.
  13. I want my husband and I to have time together to talk, watch movies, and go on dates. [This is something that Darwin and I strive to do at least a couple time per week.]
  14. I want my children to have respect for other people and among themselves.
  15. I don’t want my husband to have any vices.
  16. I want my family to be strengthened by the right hand of God.
  17. I want there to be complete peace in my household.
  18. I want there to be sincerity among us if God permits it.

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At the end of Gleny’s rather long list, she included a spontaneous written prayer:

Father, you are the King, the All-Powerful, the Worthy, the Faithful. You have never told me that you do not want me in your Kingdom with you. Forgive all of my sins and all the many things that I have done with someone or something. Thank you for forgiving me, Father. Amen.

Community Life, Family, Girls' Youth Basketball, God At Work Among Us, Homeschool, Information About the Mission, Music, Personal Reflection, Special Needs Kids

Update on Jackeline (12) and Josue (7)

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In October I wrote of our current period of discernment with Jackeline (age 12) and her special-needs brother Josue (age 7) who have been living with us since January 29th of last year. We will celebrate our 1-year anniversary with them next Friday as we continue to discern the Lord’s plans for their lives – whether we are to be their long-term family or whether they are to return to a blood relative.

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Several weeks ago I had a long meeting with their biological mother and a psychologist from Honduras’ child protective agency to try to hash through the details of whether the mom is (or will be any time soon) ready to receive her children again. To make a long story short, she’s not. We do, however, maintain a very positive and mutually supportive relationship with her, and last month on the kids’ once-a-month visit day with their biological family members, we invited her to a local beach with all 9 of us (Darwin, the 7 kids, and I). It was such a blessing that we can have a ‘family outing’ of such a mixed sort but still with so much joy, love, and encouragement.

Jackeline and Josue days after moving in with us in January 2015:

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And more recently:

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Jackeline has had a genuine turn-around in her general attitude and work ethic, although she failed to pass fifth grade again when she earned a grade of 18% on her final exam in December. She is currently preparing to take the entrance exam into Gleny and Jason’s private Christian school where, if she is accepted, would be one of 11-year-old Gleny’s classmates in her fifth-grade class.

Overall, we are incredibly content with the situation with Jackeline and Josue even though on paper it all looks pretty messy and uncertain. Jackeline has been spending a lot of time each day reading the Scriptures during these weeks of school vacation, and she’s been spending 2-4 hours per day practicing piano, recorder, and voice with our eldest, Dayana. She’s participating weekly on the girls’ basketball team I coach in the nearby city of La Ceiba, and she’s taken on the role of ‘tutor’ for little Gabriela two afternoons a week, coaching her in guided activities like Play-Doh, building blocks, physical exercises, and coloring books.

Just yesterday Jackeline found me behind our house as I was washing our clothes in a big bucket and began sharing her heart with me for over an hour, which is not typical of her. She told me that she is extremely content living with us, but at the same time she feels a responsibility to return to her biological family someday to be able to teach them all that she is currently learning. She also mentioned with serenity that, after having suffered child obesity due to her mother’s compulsive feeding of her two children, she has now learned that “food is not [her] god,” and that, although years ago she felt urges to kill either her brother or herself, she now knows that God has a purpose for both of them as His children.

Josue is as joyful as ever, and his behavior has improved to such a degree that living with him is (generally) a privilege and blessing. He still wears diapers and can only pronounce a handful of one- or two-syllable words, but he continues five mornings per week in his special needs school, where he receives very individualized attention in a class of 3-5 students.

Please pray that we may focus on living one day at a time with them, loving and guiding them moment-to-moment for God’s glory, for that is all we can do with any of them.

Community Life, Family, God At Work Among Us, Information About the Mission, Marriage, Personal Reflection

A Million Pinpricks of Light: The Hand of God in a Dark World

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We thought he was dead. Or had surely gotten a girl or two pregnant. Or possibly in prison or roaming the streets after a series of foolish decisions had finally led him to a very real destruction.

But he was standing there at our front gate.

I had been folding laundry in our bedroom when one of our wild hooligans out on the porch called, “Brayan’s here.” The brown shirt I was folding fell out of my suddenly numb hands as my legs turned on autopilot and began to take me in the least amount of steps possible out our front door, across our porch and large front lawn to that still, red-shirted figure waiting motionless on the other side of our chainlink gate.

Three or four well-intentioned huggers tried to greet and derail me in route to that gate, but I saw them as nothing more than a blur as tears began to choke out all else. There’s no way.

Just about 10 minutes prior my husband had mentioned as casually as someone mentions that the garbage man swung by: “Oh, Brayan came by the front gate this afternoon while you were in the office.”

All the blood had drained from my face while my mind frantically tried to make sense of Darwin’s words so confused by his monotony. “Wha–?” He’s not dead. Why would he come? How is he? My words tried to catch up with my brain: “What time? Why didn’t you come get me?” My mouth literally laid agape as words escaped me and a great sorrow overtook me for having missed his visit.

My sweet husband who knows all the trials that boy has put us through in the last two years – him living with us as our constantly wayward and rebellious yet precious and dearly loved son for 8 months then moving out, coming back part-time as our student and live-in-a-different-house-son-who-is-still-highly-involved-in-our-family-life, then disappearing altogether in August 2015 – just stared at me blankly, probably as taken aback at my emotional reaction as I was to his laissez-faire approach.

Unable to form his words, Darwin’s eyes read: “I’m so sorry. I was trying to protect your heart. Surely you get that, don’t you?” while my heart pled: “How is he? Why didn’t you come get me? I was only in the office and had no idea…How could you possibly think that I wouldn’t want to see him?”

Darwin picked up his cellphone and quickly dialed Brayan’s stepbrother, Arlen, who is a very close friend of ours and with whom Brayan had come earlier that afternoon. After a short conversation, Darwin asked Arlen if Brayan would be available to come back to our home for a second time that day. He gave Brayan the message, and he apparently left immediately on his bike because he arrived not five minutes later.

So as I’m crossing the front lawn, tears welling up in my eyes and my face probably contorted into the terrible shape that any parent’s face would hold upon the return of their prodigal son, he called out in a soft voice, probably wondering how I would react: “Hola, Ma.”

The next few seconds I do not remember – if he opened the gate to let himself in or if I opened it for him – but suddenly he was in my embrace as I was in his and I no longer cared that I was crying. As my chest heaved and I held him, I said, “We love you so much, Brayan,” and suddenly Darwin was walking up behind me and we were hugging him sandwich-style, which is something we do with all of our kids.

He didn’t let go, didn’t pull away, and didn’t laugh nervously. All three of us just stood there, three small people embracing with a love that cannot be explained nor defended lest we recognize it is of God at the entrance to some remote property on the foothills of some mountain range in some forgotten country begotten with violence and poverty while the rest of the world spun on without us for those few moments.

He’s so tall; Darwin’s only got a couple inches on him now. He no longer fits comfortably under my chin. He’ll be 16 in July. Where is he living? Is he okay? How does he feel to be in our home again – did we end on a bad note? I can’t really remember. All I can remember is seeing him roaming aimlessly around the gravel roads of our town so many months ago, seeing him with that teenage girl in the miniskirt on the back of his bike back in July. Why did he come? Oh, I praise you, God, that he is alive. Thank you for bringing him home. Our son is home. Thank you, Lord.

My tears came and went during our visit as we quickly invited him into the hospitality house to sit down and receive him. We talked easily and dynamically with him for the next 45 minutes or so about anything and everything. He carried himself with a certain maturity that he had never before possessed, and on several occasions he belly-laughed with his big, childish grin, betraying an innocence and exuberant joy that I assumed had been long lost.

He is living with his biological mother and stepfather in the town next to ours and is working in a local mechanic shop washing cars and helping in whatever capacity he has been trained. His four younger half-siblings live in the home with him, and he shares a bedroom with his step-grandmother, “each one with their own bed.” He likes to go fishing on the sea in his freetime with his step-dad.

Hoping we had not lost all of our parent-child bond, I asked in a motherly way that has become surprisingly natural to me over these past two years if he has a girlfriend, and he laughed heartily and said, “No. I don’t get into things like that. I’m not ready to support a woman…” and my heart rejoiced. He goes to church with two teenage male friends of his, mentioning that he doesn’t have more friends because “the other guys who live near me are just into bad stuff, and I don’t want to participate in that because I’m walking with Christ.”

The thought that consumed all others in my little brain that was still recovering from this wonderful form of shock was this: The hand of God is upon him. The hand of God is upon him! The Lord has heard us; he hears us, and he hears Brayan. There is no other explanation for why this young man has not fallen into absolute tragedy and despair. The hand of God is so clearly, so tangibly upon him. This is one of God’s miracles. 

This sense of total awe at the goodness of God consumed me for the duration of our visit and long afterward. We encouraged Brayan in his walk with Christ and prayed with him, all three of us holding hands with heads bowed in our hospitality house’s humble living room while, once again, the rest of the world seemed to keep on spinning without us. He asked for prayer for his stepfather’s alcoholism, his mother’s chest pain, his step-grandfather’s neck tumor and his own walk with the Lord, that he would be guided into the light and not be separated from God’s will. As we prayed together, I felt the presence of the Lord in a way that I had not in some time.

At some point as he sat on our hand-me-down sofa he smiled mischeviously and said: “Recognize these boots?” I glanced down at his extremely worn-down black combat boots, let out a loud, genuine laugh and said, “Your boots! You still have them! Look at you – I’m so proud that you’ve taken care of them.” They were the same boots we had bought him about a year ago, and this was the same boy who used to lose or destroy any and all clothing, shoes, books, backpacks, etc, within a blink of an eye of receiving it.

After our long catch-up chat and then our time of prayer, it only seemed natural to invite Brayan to stay for dinner. With his sheepish grin he accepted, and we headed over to our open-air dining room that used to be his own. I put the rice and beans and leftover pasta on the stove and began pouring glasses of Darwin’s fresh cows’ milk for everyone. I even got out popsicles from the freezer that had been donated by a local grocery store; this was an extremely special day.

I glided around our muggy kitchen as he and Darwin sat at our large wooden dining room table, probably talking about guy stuff. Our 7-year-old Gabriela came in to help me serve the plates, we rang the little apple-shaped dinner bell, and everyone came barreling in from hand-washing their clothes and doing 57 other things. Brayan’s face radiated joy, and he looked like he felt at home. Well, he was.

Over dinner he talked more than I remember him talking before, and his posture and attitude gave off a sense of maturity, a precious gratefulness, and an undeniable respect that certainly were not with him before, or at least had not been as developed. He never broke eye contact; he talked easily, openly and coherently. He reminisced with our 7 kids, especially Dayana, our eldest who is his age and with whom he has the most memories, about funny happenings or lessons learned from the ‘early years’ (which was only two years ago) with us at the Living Waters Ranch.

So night fell, we did dinner clean-up, Brayan laughed as he witnessed an ‘attack-Dad’ tickle fight, and then we walked him back to the front gate and gave him another big hug to book-end the visit that profoundly encouraged us in a way that perhaps nothing before then had. He hopped on his bike, making plans with Darwin to go play soccer the next afternoon with our kids while he’s on ‘vacation’ from his job at the mechanic shop, but my heart neither leapt with expectation nor scoffed with doubt as he rode off into the night.

Our 11-year-old fireball, Gleny – who used to actively persecute Brayan during the first year or so that he was in our lives — jumped up into my arms and shouted off to Brayan in the night: “Goodnight, Brayan!” He answered back over his shoulder as I stood with Gleny in my arms under the dark night sky speckled with a million pinpricks of light in total awe: The hand of God is over Brayan.

To read previous posts about our journey with Brayan, you can go to: It All Started with a Cup of Water or “Hola Ma”

 

Community Life, Family, God At Work Among Us, Homeschool, Information About the Mission, Marriage, Music, Personal Reflection, Special Needs Kids

Nursing Homes, Block Empires, Tree Stunts and More: Photos from December 2015

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We certainly have been spending several hours per day in dining-room tutoring with our 5 older kids as Gabi and Josue enjoy constructing block towers on the floor. All our kids will return to school in early February (the Honduran calendar has the extended vacation during the winter rather than summer months).

 

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Only a few weeks ago Gabi didn’t have the focus or creativity to sit and put two blocks on top of each other, but with a little practice and encouragement, look at the small empire she and Josue have built!

 

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Dayana (15), Gleny (11) and Jason (8) celebrated their 2-year anniversary in our household during a family vacation with Darwin and I to Honduras’ capital and largest city, Tegucigalpa.

 

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8-year-old Jason, our beloved opera singer, our inquisitive young mind, our make-you-pee-in-your-pants stand-up comic, our consistent gentleman, our Energizer bunny, and our Godly-man-in-training

 

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The kids aren’t the only ones who enjoy climbing trees!

 

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“Ready, Jason?”  “Ready, Dad!”

 

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(From left to right): myself, Gleny, Darwin and Dayana at the zoo in Tegucigalpa with Jason as the photographer

 

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At a national park above the capital of Tegucigalpa. I’m sure their schoolteachers are glad to have a break until February from these two rabble-rousers!

 

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Back on the homefront at the Living Waters Ranch, Miss Carminda and Miss Alma had a flour fight in our kitchen!

 

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“Little Miss Claus” (the name I gave her because she looks like Santa Claus’ daughter) playing the recorder in our December music recital in our home/mission. About a year ago she bought that dress at a thrift store for the equivalent of about 50 cents!

 

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Josselyn (age 11, member of our family since July 2015) and Jason (age 8), singing with Darwin’s youth choir in December. It was Josselyn’s first time to participate in the choir’s performances and play the recorder in front of an audience!

 

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Derbin, a 14-year-old neighbor of ours who participates in various activities at the Living Waters Ranch, playing piano in our front yard during his first public music recital.

 

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One day I began trimming the large, leafy trees in front of our dining room when Goliath, our Rottweiler, began playing with the leaves and burying himself under them. That’s when the whole crew came to join in the fun!

 

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If only he would stop walking! We’re trying to tame the beast!

 

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Don’t worry — Miss Martha’s coming in to help!

 

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Good job, Jason! You finally got him just where you wanted him!

 

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Because it was so much fun with the dog, let’s try it with the kids!

 

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Darwin leading the Living Waters Ranch’s youth choir in songs of joy in a local nursing home

 

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Miss Martha, our dear sister and fellow laborer, accompanied the choir to the performance in the nursing home because she had worked there for several years and was excited to see the elderly that she used to take care of

 

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Christian and Arlen, both choir members, handing out juice and homemade bread after the recital
Family, Homeschool, Information About the Mission, Music

Vacation from Blog in December 2015

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I sense that God is calling me to take a vacation from writing and maintaining this blog until early January to allow me to focus on Darwin and our kids during this Christmas vacation time. In these last few months I feel that I have been so busy running back and forth, planning, moving and organizing offices and storage rooms, having meetings, sending in paperwork, drafting budgets and then re-drafting them, going to schools and government offices, maintaining our checkbook, creating and managing work contracts, teaching classes and Bible studies, being everyone’s chauffeur, etc, that I almost haven’t had time to really be ‘mom’ to our kids, and that needs to change. We have planned several day trips in December to see Darwin’s family and to celebrate Christmas with our faith community and other friends, and we plan on slowing down and doing the daily work of cooking, cleaning, spending time together as a family without so many distractions, tutoring our kids academically, studying God’s Word, washing our clothes by hand, etc, before everything starts back up again in January.

This week we administered our final exams in homeschool (the Honduran school year goes from February-November, so this week all 7 of our kids entered into their annual school vacation time), graduated the students who passed their grade, and are still in the midst of wrapping up a lot of loose ends as we wind down with all the newness, all the changes and challenges that have come with this year. We have 5 upcoming Christmas music recitals in nursing homes, schools, and in our home/mission in these next two weeks along with finalizing and turning in a lot of paperwork, and then we’ve planned to take a general rest as a family (Darwin and I and our 7 kids) until early January when everything starts up again.

Please pray for us during this time, that the Lord would use these 3-4 weeks in December to knit us even closer together as His family, and that Darwin and I would not fall prey to ‘doing’ so much that we forget the simply ‘be’ with our kids, love them, and pour into their lives. Please pray also for my ongoing struggle with insomnia, as in these past 9 or 10 days I have only slept 4 nights and am unable to take naps during the day. I feel exhausted in every sense of the word and am pleading that the Lord would grant me rest in Him so that I may receive new strength to fulfill the plans He has laid before us.

Thank you to everyone who supports us – in encouraging emails and letters, in prayer, or financially. We earnestly give thanks to God for you and hope that your holiday season is restful yet fruitful for God’s glory.